I personally hate dealing with conflict! It makes me feel extremely uncomfortable and like my skin is crawling. I would rather just ignore it or change everything. I had a very bad outlook on life and thought that people were generally useless stupid and selfish creatures who only cared for themselves. Although I am not 100% wrong on that opinion it was a very closed view of life and it really showed me how I thought about myself. I didn’t think I was worth standing up for, even for myself. I didn’t think others cared about my opinion or my needs. By thinking that I was a mind reader I didn’t stand up for myself. I have walked away from a lot of money and put myself through unnecessary stress for no reason.
I have made it one of my commitments to myself to face conflicts and be true to myself and get what I deserve out of life. No more settling for the crumbs of life. This doesn’t mean I will become an aggressive person or vindictive. I am currently dealing with a situation where a friend owes me $270 and instead of just writing it off as a loss like I normally would have done, I am working with this person to resolve the situation in a mutually beneficial solution. I am only asking for a weekly payment to get what is mine. I am not going to get where I want to be in life by being a rug. I am learning and realizing that I am worthy of getting the things I deserve and I am not less than anyone. We are all equal and unique. Conflicts in life will arise, and when they do I will face then properly and at the end of the day all will be fair.