One of the biggest issues I have had to overcome in recovery is fear.  I know that fear – particularly fear of change and an unknown future, would keep me trapped in my active alcoholism.  Being “under the influence” was a familiar and comfortable place.  A lot of my fears were based on what I knew would be challenges ahead – and I would have to face them without a crutch.

I also had a lot of fear around recovery itself.  Would it be boring?  Would I fail in my attempt to stay sober?  Would success in recovery mean that others’ expectations of me would be more than I could handle?

I knew that if I allowed fear to get the best of me, the decisions I made going forward would be faulty at best, and more than likely would be based on what I thought others would consider acceptable.

It was important for me to face each fear as it arose and make an effort to overcome it using the tools I had been given in treatment.  If I gave in to fear, I would be unable to create the life I wanted for myself in recovery.  If I avoided issues instead of facing my fear, they would only become that much bigger.

I have found that writing my fears down has helped me put them in perspective.  It has also been beneficial to talk about my worries with those who support my recovery.  I am trying to deal with life as it comes, without overwhelming myself or projecting into the future.  In this way, I have been able to move forward in my recovery with less stress and much more serenity.


03Oct 2017

THE START The very start of recovery is Socialization at 12 step meetings. The first part of that is finding a HOME group. In effect finding a section of people that will accept you, warts and all. That is they shake your hand and introduce themselves, I hated that part when they asked if I […]

12Jul 2017

Lead by an experienced Addictions Counsellor, the groups include such discussion topics as: Understanding Relapse (how it happens and how to avoid it) Personality of an Addicted (tolerance, anxiety, grandiosity) Relapse Warning Signs (attitude & behavior changes, H.A.L.T.) Setting Goals for Relapse Prevention The sessions are held every Thursday afternoon at 2:30 p.m. in our […]

12May 2017

I personally hate dealing with conflict! It makes me feel extremely uncomfortable and like my skin is crawling. I would rather just ignore it or change everything. I had a very bad outlook on life and thought that people were generally useless stupid and selfish creatures who only cared for themselves. Although I am not […]

12May 2017

Commitments, who needs them? Well as it turns out, to have a successful life everyone does. In my life before recovery I had no problem making commitments to other people and following through with them. I needed people to like me and feel like I was useful and I could only do that through the […]

30Aug 2016
thoughts on gratitude after addiction recovery

Every once in a while, I forget to be grateful for what I have gained this past year in recovery and the people who have given me continued support.  I admit it is still easy for me to focus on the negative instead of the positive. One day this past week, I sat down and […]

04Jul 2016
Finding Happiness

Coming into recovery gives all of us a chance to turn our lives around. It certainly did for me. For a long time, alcohol was the only thing that made me happy or gave me any sense of comfort. Of course, it was only a temporary, fleeting happiness. Once I got sober, I had to […]

27Jun 2016
work hard and stay humble after recovering from addiction

It is very easy for those of us in recovery to forget where we came from – we can sometimes have a very short memory.  We suddenly forget how we started our lives in recovery – and those people who helped us along the way. Some of us can even let our ego make us […]

22Jun 2016
recovery takes time

Thinking back, I realize how easy it was to be on what we in recovery call “the pink cloud”.  This had something of a positive affect – it drove my excitement and confidence in returning to a sober life. I also knew that the enthusiasm I had could be a double-edged sword, because it could […]

10Jun 2016
now vs then after addiction recovery

My journey in recovery began a year ago.  The feelings I had then were ones of despair and depression.  Thankfully, I became convinced that returning to treatment was the only answer.  During this first year, I have had a healthy fear of relapse coupled with a very strong desire to maintain my sobriety.  I have […]