One of the biggest issues I have had to overcome in recovery is fear. I know that fear – particularly fear of change and an unknown future, would keep me trapped in my active alcoholism. Being “under the influence” was a familiar and comfortable place. A lot of my fears were based on what I knew would be challenges ahead – and I would have to face them without a crutch.
I also had a lot of fear around recovery itself. Would it be boring? Would I fail in my attempt to stay sober? Would success in recovery mean that others’ expectations of me would be more than I could handle?
I knew that if I allowed fear to get the best of me, the decisions I made going forward would be faulty at best, and more than likely would be based on what I thought others would consider acceptable.
It was important for me to face each fear as it arose and make an effort to overcome it using the tools I had been given in treatment. If I gave in to fear, I would be unable to create the life I wanted for myself in recovery. If I avoided issues instead of facing my fear, they would only become that much bigger.
I have found that writing my fears down has helped me put them in perspective. It has also been beneficial to talk about my worries with those who support my recovery. I am trying to deal with life as it comes, without overwhelming myself or projecting into the future. In this way, I have been able to move forward in my recovery with less stress and much more serenity.