Commitments, who needs them? Well as it turns out, to have a successful life everyone does. In my life before recovery I had no problem making commitments to other people and following through with them. I needed people to like me and feel like I was useful and I could only do that through the approval of others. But making commitments to myself? Well I could do what I needed to do for myself tomorrow, unfortunately tomorrow never came. I found that keeping commitments usually depended on what I would get out of them or who it was effecting. It would be easy to leave a good friend or a family member stranded to go and play cool guy with my drug dealing buddies. I knew that I would always have my family and I could apologize to them when then I needed something.

Commitments are for myself a very confusing thing. I often over complicate my life by taking on commitments that are unrealistic or make an easy project feel like a university science fair project. Lately though I have made a continued commitment to myself to stop doing this. I am trying to live by the four agreements; be impeccable with your word, don’t take anything personally, don’t make assumptions, and always do your best. If I can keep using these agreements in my everyday life I believe that I will have a happier more fulfilling life.

Now that I am enjoying early recovery I have to make it a priority to focus on my recovery over anything else. Work, school, family, girls, money. EVERTHING! If I cannot keep my sobriety now than I will lose all those things anyways. I have to make it a commitment to call my sponsor everyday, say my prayers, and go to meetings. I don’t know much about living sober in my adult life, so it is my commitment to people who are doing well in recovery and follow their actions.

Jason

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12May 2017

I personally hate dealing with conflict! It makes me feel extremely uncomfortable and like my skin is crawling. I would rather just ignore it or change everything. I had a very bad outlook on life and thought that people were generally useless stupid and selfish creatures who only cared for themselves. Although I am not […]

12May 2017

Commitments, who needs them? Well as it turns out, to have a successful life everyone does. In my life before recovery I had no problem making commitments to other people and following through with them. I needed people to like me and feel like I was useful and I could only do that through the […]

30Aug 2016
thoughts on gratitude after addiction recovery

Every once in a while, I forget to be grateful for what I have gained this past year in recovery and the people who have given me continued support.  I admit it is still easy for me to focus on the negative instead of the positive. One day this past week, I sat down and […]

04Jul 2016
Finding Happiness

Coming into recovery gives all of us a chance to turn our lives around. It certainly did for me. For a long time, alcohol was the only thing that made me happy or gave me any sense of comfort. Of course, it was only a temporary, fleeting happiness. Once I got sober, I had to […]

27Jun 2016
work hard and stay humble after recovering from addiction

It is very easy for those of us in recovery to forget where we came from – we can sometimes have a very short memory.  We suddenly forget how we started our lives in recovery – and those people who helped us along the way. Some of us can even let our ego make us […]

22Jun 2016
recovery takes time

Thinking back, I realize how easy it was to be on what we in recovery call “the pink cloud”.  This had something of a positive affect – it drove my excitement and confidence in returning to a sober life. I also knew that the enthusiasm I had could be a double-edged sword, because it could […]

10Jun 2016
now vs then after addiction recovery

My journey in recovery began a year ago.  The feelings I had then were ones of despair and depression.  Thankfully, I became convinced that returning to treatment was the only answer.  During this first year, I have had a healthy fear of relapse coupled with a very strong desire to maintain my sobriety.  I have […]

09Jun 2016
Man standing alone on the end of a jetty, looking over a foggy lake.

A lot of people in recovery have an unhealthy habit of isolating – I know I did.  We do this for many reasons.  We may feel shame or guilt for our behaviours when we were drinking or using, we may fear being around people, places and things that could trigger our addiction, or we may […]

02May 2016

Relapse is more than just using alcohol or drugs. It is the progressive process of becoming so dysfunctional in recovery that self-medication with alcohol or drugs seems like a reasonable choice. The relapse process is a lot like going a little insane. The first thoughts that were not ok yesterday are ok today.  I tell […]